Why most people can NEVER “fix” their problems

 

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You Can’t “Fix” Most Problems

By Jim Edwards
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Fixing problems rarely works and leads us to repeat those problems over and over – sometimes for years.

A lot of us try to “fix” things that aren’t working in our lives and business. It seems natural.

We try to fix those problems by:
– getting more knowledge from someone else
– hiring someone else to “fix” the problem for us
– reading a book
– surfing the Web for answers
– asking a friend
– buying a new course or product

But you know, sometimes the solution is to stop trying.

being_one_with_nature_400_clr_10163By that I don’t mean give up… I mean just stop, get quiet, and reflect a little bit.

Often the answers we need to any problem are already inside us.

The problem with problems is, we’re so noisy inside our own heads that we can’t hear the solution calling out in its quiet voice.

Stress and the rush to “fix” whatever is wrong as fast as possible creates so much noise and confusion we can’t hear or see the solution that’s often right in front of our faces.

I’m going to make a suggestion to you – one friend to another.

The next time you have a problem or need to do something new, your fist step is to do NOTHING.

That’s right.

Step #1: Do NOTHING.

Instead, sit quietly and visualize the successful outcome you want to achieve.

In other words, don’t focus on the problem, visualize the successful outcome.

Whether it’s a big problem or a small problem… new problem or old problem… forget the problem for a few minutes and focus on getting very clear on the outcome you want in this situation.

Then get quiet and listen for the solution as you TRUST that a solution, or at least the next step in the process, will become clear.

You may need to repeat this process a few times with sticky problems, but as you practice, you’ll see it gets easier and easier.

Visualizing the outcome you want – not focusing on the problem at hand – holds the key to actually solving your problems.

I personally start every day with this type of visualization.

I sit quietly aned see the entire day going smoothly and well hours before it happens. And guess what? More often than not my days go smoothly and problems get solved naturally and with low stress.

That’s not to imply I don’t have frustrations (I do)… but I have FEWER frustrations and get more DONE by doing this simple exercise FIRST in my daily routine than by not doing it.

Bottom line: next time you have a problem, instead of rushing in to “fix” things that are going wrong and looking for external solutions, get quiet and look inward for the direction you need.

It’s so simple – yet so powerful.

Give it a try – you have everything to gain and nothing to lose!

33 Comments

  • Richard Rossbauer

    Reply Reply February 21, 2015

    Fine suggestion – but getting to the point where you can do that
    is the first major hurdle. After that, it could well be the answer.

    • BigJim

      Reply Reply February 21, 2015

      Richard,

      It, like anything else, just takes practice 🙂

      Jim

  • Doug Cutler

    Reply Reply February 21, 2015

    I believe we all have karma and come with certain problems we have to deal with.
    Some involve others. Meditating brings in the deeper self and likely the solution.

    • BigJim

      Reply Reply February 21, 2015

      Agreed 🙂

  • Michaela Thiede

    Reply Reply February 21, 2015

    Hey Jim,
    I totally agree.
    Sometimes it’s that simple.
    We „just“ have to allow us to pause for a moment, become quiet and listen. Listen to our inner voice.
    The good thing is that we can learn to listen to our voice again. It’s not dependent on the circumstances. We just have to do it! Maybe it’s a learning process, but we can practice it every day.

    Thanks for the reminder.

    Blessings
    Michaela

    • BigJim

      Reply Reply February 21, 2015

      Hi Michaela,

      That little voice often holds the key, definitely!

      Jim

  • Terry Wood

    Reply Reply February 21, 2015

    Jim,

    I could not agree with you more. I have found by trying to find a solution to the problem much of my focus went on the problem and not the solution. Visualization is very key for finding the right fix to a particular problem.

    Thank you for sharing the advice. The answer truly can be found in the quietness.

    • BigJim

      Reply Reply February 21, 2015

      Terry,

      Yep… that quietness is the source

      Jim

  • Bob Moore

    Reply Reply February 21, 2015

    Thanks, Jim, for your savvy message. It is very timely for me to read this today as I am deciding on what to do (or not do) about a few challenges (problems) I would like to “solve” sooner than later. I have decided, at least for right now, not to decided, wait, think and see what comes up from “inside.” Bob

  • Tracey Fieber

    Reply Reply February 21, 2015

    Hey Jim,

    It was great meeting you in person on the Marketer’s Cruise. Thanks for sharing your inspiring story with us.

    Your article today reminds me of what happened after the Cruise.

    So often when we have taken time away from business, when we return to the office it feels like work bombards us. This is ESPECIALLY the time to take a time-out to practice being quiet and listen to that inner voice. I find when I do, the answers come to me. It allows me to stay connected to my inner voice, and know what the right path for me is.

    You’re right, it does get easier with practice!

    Tracey

  • Ellen

    Reply Reply February 21, 2015

    I agree; stress makes creativity impossible, so we use a 4 step process when things aren’t going well:
    1. GIVE THANKS (even through gritted teeth sometimes) – blessings don’t always come wrapped in pretty boxes
    2. REJOICE – that it isn’t worse than it is! God always has a better plan and is merciful to us.
    3. ASK FOR HELP – there is safety ina multitude of counselors, and you don’t have because you don’t ask.
    4. DO GOOD TO OTHERS – sometimes you don’t get your ice cream because you didn’t clean your room; it might be as simple as that. So take a minute and do that thing you know you need to do, but haven’t. Get your focus outward onto serving others. Isn’t that the point of every business?
    I would work in the garden for hours … then sit down for 15 minutes, and that is always when the answer to the problem would come. Creative, effective solutions need an atmosphere of gratefulness and peace if they are to grow; it is their water and sunshine. And sometimes we realize that the biggest problems carried the biggest blessings, and changed our lives.

  • Virginia

    Reply Reply February 21, 2015

    Let it go. Give yourself permission to walk away and let ‘the problem’ simmer in the background of your mind. The old advice of sleep on it works too for bigger ‘stuff’. Getting quiet and letting a sense of ease run though you takes away the pressure. I grimace when people talk about ‘fixing’ a problem. Find alternatives, don’t mask over the issue.

  • Anne Preston

    Reply Reply February 21, 2015

    You are right on Jim!
    We attempt to control – yet all we REALLY need to do is ALLOW. Those expectations that we can “be the doer’ and fix things is what causes the frustration – because reality will never be as we expect it to be. So much better to be in the now, so we can respond to what is true – right now, in the moment. Thanks for the reminder to use presence as a resource! You rock!

  • e, rogers

    Reply Reply February 21, 2015

    A question…do you think youve always had that approach or has this come with time. I fully believe in visualizing the answer but some times visualizations seems to be so fuzzy.

    • shamira

      Reply Reply February 21, 2015

      A question…do you think youve always had that approach or has this come with time. I fully believe in visualizing the answer but some times visualizations seems to be so fuzzy.

      • BigJim

        Reply Reply February 23, 2015

        Shamira,

        I think it’s innate… but we have to learn to develop it like any muscle or skill

        Jim

  • Darrel

    Reply Reply February 21, 2015

    I call it prayer…

  • Patty Rutkowski

    Reply Reply February 21, 2015

    Hi Jim,
    It was so nice to visit with you and Terri on the Marketer’s Cruise. I agree with you about meditation…Someone shared something on the cruise that really resonated with me…
    I OVERCOMPLICATE and then JUSTIFY the OVERCOMPLICATION.
    I am afraid I do that and get overwhelmed and do nothing instead.
    Meditating on it, or having someone (like Wayne) help me talk it out and make a plan for resolving the problem is what seems to work.

    You should think about re-releasing that course you did years ago which included meditation, prayer, EFT, spiritualism, finding yourself, can’t remember the name of your weekly course, but it was life changing for me at least in one respect. You had an EFT teacher on who said EFT would work for everything. I was absolutely TERRIFIED OF FLYING, and using two-three minutes of EFT changed me completely, immediately, and I’ve never had any flying anxiety since.

    Just a thought…take care, great to see you guys. All my best to your mom and dad…such fantastic people.

    Patty

  • Michael

    Reply Reply February 21, 2015

    Good advice! I do computer programming at work and frequently get wrapped up in a problem by jumping from one quick idea to another. Generally they fail.
    But when I stop, pause, clear my head and step through everything the problem and then the solution become clear!

    BTW: When I play some “meditative” music/sounds that are in alpha or theta brain waves, the mind gets much clearer! You can buy these on internet and play them with a head set.

  • Dave Hornbeck

    Reply Reply February 21, 2015

    Sitting quietly is simple. Quieting the mind enough to allow that “little voice” to be heard takes some doing. The payoff is worth the effort.

    A close cousin of “listen to your inner voice” is “trust your gut”. Not all of the time, but once in a while, your gut just knows something is or isn’t right. We need to be able to trust others, and we need to trust ourselves as well.

  • Tony Crofts

    Reply Reply February 21, 2015

    I too have used this method for years. I add one step to it though. Before settling down to think I just go through all the known FACTS of a problem. I don’t do anything with them, like try to analize the problem. I don’t place any particular importance or outcome on them either. No attachment to the outcome as the Buddists say.

    Then, when I just sit and meditate for about 10 mins or so, I just let my sub-conscious take care of things as you described. Solutions seem to come easier somehow, having the facts uppermost in the conscoius mind.

    Thanks for another great email Jim

    Tony

    • BigJim

      Reply Reply February 23, 2015

      Tony,

      Thanks for adding that… really helpful! 🙂

      Jim

  • Jeff Muir

    Reply Reply February 21, 2015

    Great work Jim. You keep adding value to my life and I really appreciate your work.

  • Gail S. Goodman

    Reply Reply February 22, 2015

    I often feel over whelmed by a pile of books,papers etc and can’t get started to get rid of the pile. Stress builds and to stop that feeling I walk away. Now I’m going to try and sit quietly and envision how good the area will look. It’s going to be a hard,very hard behavior to change because as I write this I remember doing this in my bedroom at age 13. It isn’t like its stuff to throw away but I don’t have the space to organize.My den is full of a friends stuff. Maybe if that was empty I could really tackle it. I know I want to. Since I moved here 5 years ago I’ve collected lots of antique and even antique furniture and thats what I use. Its something I have to do. I had shelves build in the den then my friend couldn’t take all his stuff when he moved and the shelves got used by him. Gee his is revealing. I’ll try your method.thanks Jim.

  • Pete

    Reply Reply February 22, 2015

    Jim, great article. I do it right before going to sleep and let my subconscious bring me the insights I need. Keep up the great articles.

  • Terry Silver

    Reply Reply February 22, 2015

    You Rock Jim. I just got fired from a call center for a major cable company and was worried about the bills, money, etc, etc. Then I sat for a moment and thought about the outcome of what I wanted money for. In the quiet of my mind I visualized a book about my past work. I titled it ” “Cable Crazy Call Center” a fictional book on the on goings of a call center worker dealing with customers as they complain about billings, outages, rate hikes etc. I am just getting started but already see the finished product.
    Thanks a Million for your suggestion. Ps any tips to aid a first time novelist?

  • Tienny

    Reply Reply February 22, 2015

    Thanks for this.

  • David Huskey

    Reply Reply February 22, 2015

    Jim,

    The gift of your article is precious, priceless… Learning to pause before responding to any situation, question or problem, then just looking at it from ALL sides, then allowing a field of quietness to surround it all … from that silence an answer emerges. With practice this is getting easier and easier. I can always trust the answers that arise when I do this….

    Many times it feels I do not have time for that “Pause” but when I do, it is always just right. It is getting to where the “Pause” takes almost no time at all.

    Thanks so much, David

  • Larry Downing

    Reply Reply February 22, 2015

    We are taught to become “problem solvers” first. I agree with you, why not focus on what you desire?

  • BigJim

    Reply Reply February 23, 2015

    Hi All,

    Was out of town for a couple of weeks… but I’m back now 🙂

    Thanks for all the thoughts… I learned some cool enhancements to this thanks to you guys!!

    We will definitely keep doing these JEMs once a week as long as people are interested.

    I really appreciate you taking the time to share your thoughts.. you guys ROCK!

    Jim

  • Sharon Horne-Ellstrom

    Reply Reply February 24, 2015

    Everything we need IS already inside of us.
    Problems or obstacles are there to SHOW us something…until we see it, we will keep getting it served up to us on a silver platter.
    Thanks for the JEM Jim.

  • Carol

    Reply Reply February 24, 2015

    Hi Jim, I couldn’t agree with you more, even though I have to MAKE myself sit down and do that after about a month of trying so hard to figure out the solution myself. I think many of us are addicted to the adrenaline rush we get by running around trying to fix everything:). Apologize for having to ask this again, but how do I sign up for a coaching session with you? Lost the info….

  • Rex

    Reply Reply March 28, 2018

    “Problems are never fixed. We only change our perspective on them.”
    ~Carl Jung

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